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Coming back, I could feel the eyes on me. I was fresh meat. I couldbarely walk in my heels - my heels! - and tried to not topple over.End Diary EntryI was so na?ve back then. I was also hooked on Kristy. I went out tothe club for seven straight days. I met some people. I made somefriends. I wanted more. I never wanted to be a cross-dresser (not thatI have anything against it). I wanted to be a shemale or tgirl - forlife - very quickly.But I was not-not-not into guys-guys-guys. I still found women soincredibly attractive. I wanted to be like them and be desired by men,but ... guys were, well guys and girls were soft and sexy.Diary Entry: May 2003I went to a party that a couple of tgirls were having in [name of towndeleted to protect the guilty]. At some point, the sex started. Not me,obviously, but Tara, one of the hosts. She got absolutely railed by somedude about two feet from where I was sitting. She seemed to be enjoyingit, although I think I'm all set with sex. I know my tits aren't as big as mom's, or Barb's, but they will be soon, I promise. They really will."It was a strange moment. Marie, barely a teenager, was sitting there in all her innocent beauty trying so hard to make me cum, and masturbating herself at the same time, and ruining the moment by worrying. I didn't know quite what to say."God, I love this too, Marie. I never want it to stop. And your tits are gorgeous just the way they are. I think I could cum just staring at them. Why are you worried?" Well, I know something you don't know... and I'm afraid that you might want mom and Barbara more than you want me, and I know that that will never happen." Huh?" I said. "What are you talking about?" I got this terrible feeling that she thought mom and Barbara were going to die or something, and that they had told her but not me."Well, mom made me promise me not to tell you this, but I think we should have no secrets now that we're lovers," Marie said."No secrets is right," I said. I.
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